9. Peter and Mom

Timing. Here's my mom's story of how she became friends with a stranger.

My mom has a friend named Peter. I've only seen Peter maybe 3 times in my life. But I know that he's a friend of my mother's. He once brought me to the airport for my Europe trip in high school. He saved my butt when he volunteered to be my interviewee for an academic paper.  And now, he's helping me seek employment by setting up an interview with his company's human resource manager. Peter has a booming laugh, sparkly smile, and tells his stories with his hands.

I always assumed Peter worked with my mom in the same company. But, it turns out, Peter worked in the building next door. They never worked in the same building together, nor are their companies affiliated.

Confused, I asked my mom how she met Peter. And it went like this-

"I always see him on the train. Every day, after work, we'd be at the same train stop at the same time," she laughed as her eyebrows lit up with excitement.. "Until one day, I asked him which department he worked in. Turns out, he works right next door! All this time I thought we worked together."

"So..." I wanted to figure this out. "Do you hang out with Peter a lot?"

She shook her head. "Now I don't see him anymore. Usually, we both get out at 10:00PM and we would take the train together." My mom opened her daily newspaper and turned to the entertainment section. I looked at her paper and saw Hong Kong celebrities waving back at me with her plastic smile.

She took a sip from her coffee mug and pointed at me, "But now I get out 10 minutes earlier. And I do not see him anymore." She shook her head and laughed at the irony. Mom went back to her celebrity news.

All it took was for one person to step forward, break the ice between them with acknowledgment  and the possibility for a friendship flooded in. Timing brought my mom and Peter together. And now just because of 10 minutes, their paths cross and they don't see each other as often anymore. Yet, I always know that Uncle Peter is a phone call away.

We walk by millions of people each day. But how many of the same people you walk by everyday? How do you choose to interact with them? Do you walk past them? Do you just make eye contact and continue on with your day? Have you acknowledged them? How about your neighbor? Do you say 'good morning'?  Your neighbor who sits at the stoop to smoke a cigarette? How about the person who delivers your mail? The bus driver? The taxi driver? The cashier at your deli? The person who takes out your trash? The person who makes your soy latte every morning? Do you even acknowledge the person currently living in the same home with you?

How about the person you're sitting next to on the train? Do you sit in silence? Move around them like they don't exist? If so, why? Or why not?

My challenge for you is to look at yourself in the mirror. Smile, notice your smile, and then get lost looking into your deep, beautiful eyes. See yourself.

And then the next time you're sitting down on the bus, train, getting into the taxi, grabbing your coffee, or walking past the same person you see every day, stop them. Acknowledge them and say 'hi.' Because you see yourself and you see them too. We don't just exist, we're all important, we all matter, and we're all living. And we are alive.